He speaks

     I have never seen God, nor I have ever heard him with my own ears. I have not felt his touch. How many times I wished God just sat with me down, when I needed Him, when I needed to make a really important decision. How many times I said "He doesn't hear me when I need Him..."I always believed in God, but I was not sure if I heard His voice., or if He heard mine. I saw people praying with their eyes closed, their faces so deeply engaged, they seemed so much involved, but when I prayed I did not feel that, and I did not know why. I tried closing my eyes, covering up my face, and feeling "something" holly, but nothing ever came.

     I did not know how is that He speaks until now. I have finally figured that out. He speaks to me through music. I know it might sound a bit loony, but I just discovered that when I play my iPod Christian songs, or when I hear a nice tune of a hymn in church, I get this feeling all over my body I can't explain what it is. My heart starts pounding faster, my mind is so focused, my eyes see things we do not normally notice, and inside of me, in the middle of this emotional confusion, a feeling is created. A feeling no one can ever understand.

I played the iPod today with the song from Natalie Grant "The Real Me" while I was driving, and suddenly I felt the touch of Holy Spirit on my heart, I looked up and the sky seemed to be unusually beautiful, the winter skyline so pure, the tree tops, the snow hills and thousands of flickering street lights in the Valley Forge, just like scattered diamonds all over the place at the foot hills of Appalachian Mountains...I also realized I was thinking in English. As a second language learner, it has happened. I catch myself actually using my second language when I pray, and I've finally got it...He does speak...

     God talks to us. He finds the way to do that, and if we open up and listen, we are able to hear. Not the way humans do, the way that involves your heart. That is how I know He speaks. It pierces through you in most wonderful way. Your mind is not even able to pick up all these words, and emotions that are gathering inside of you...so all I was able to do was just letting the tears of joy stream down my face, thinking how much I love Him. I always wondered why I was gifted in Music. I played the piano professionally, I was very successful, I was so good that every song I listened to on the radio, every tune I heard, I was able to reproduce without notes on the piano. I had the perfect pitch. Yet, I did not know that this gift came from God. I was using it all these years, but the knowledge was not fully appreciated. God given talent. Selfishly nurtured within my own pride.

    As my advice, if you are still not sure if He listens, all I can say is open up to Him, let it all go through you. Let it all fill you up, let him unveil you, and you loosen up the grip, you will see, feel, hear, smell or taste the way you have never did. He does speak...